Facebook Etiquette – My Thoughts

Facebook-taggingSomething’s been bothering me for a little while now … I don’t know how to say it without possibly coming off as a dick, or hurting some feelings, but I don’t think many people have given it much thought, so here goes :

I’ve noticed a growing trend on Facebook, especially in the open mic scene, where instead of creating an event, and inviting people to it, there is simply a poster pic and a whole lot of names tagged. Including mine.

If asked (and often even without being asked) I’d happily share a poster and help increase the reach of any musician, artist, etc. After all, I know how hard it is to promote an event, and I LOVE supporting live music and community events whenever I can.

But I’m not being asked, and there’s something about this that I find under-handed.

Maybe it’s that it goes against my sense of connection; I’ve been helped enormously by tons of other people, and wouldn’t have been able to accomplish the things I have without their help. It makes me feel great to be able to reciprocate that help, and pay it forward to others. Being randomly tagged without a direct word from the person means I don’t get that feeling. I’m not being helpful, I’m being used.

When I share something, I’m saying that I think it’s of value, and that I think my friends will value it too. To have something shared to my timeline, because I’ve been tagged along with 17 other people, removes me from the equation entirely. I’m just a way to increase Facebook reach and ranking, and a possible attendee.

My friends list is precious to me; I’ve cultivated a group of passionate, supportive, actively-sharing people that fill my feed (and my day) with thoughtful, thought-provoking, sometimes funny moments and connections that I cherish. They are not simply an audience to be advertised to.

It can also be really confusing to some. More than a few times I’ve had people msg or even actually show up to an event thinking I would be there when I wasn’t, because I’d been tagged in a post.

So I’ve learned how to un-tag myself. I’m happy to share events and posts, and I love receiving invites to local events even if I can’t make it out, and will happily share them along to my friends if asked. I’m just not cool with being a megaphone: an inanimate object used to make someone’s voice louder. Ask me. Please.

Peace, Love, Music,

~Carol <3

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